Do's and don'ts of J'Ouvert Brooklyn

Every Labor Day, the West Indian Day parade - also known as Carnival - turns Eastern Parkway in Brooklyn into a sea of feathers, soca, and jerk chicken. It attracts upwards of three million people and is one of the premier parties in the United States.

Little known, however, is another parade that begins a little earlier in the morning - at 2 am to be precise. It's called J'Ouvert (from the French jour ouvert, or day open), and it's a somewhat smaller, more intimate affair. Unlike the million watt sound systems of Carnival, J'Ouvert is limited to steel drum "floats" - ragtag collections of pushcarts pulled along by U-Haul vans. It's a fantastic party, and because of the smaller size, everyone is encouraged to march along with the bands. (More on that later.)

Anyways, little is found on the web regarding this party, so I thought I'd share some do's and don'ts for enjoying J'Ouvert.

DO NOT: Show up at 2 am. It'll probably be a ghost town. There's a big Dimanche Gras party that goes until 2 am, and then people take their time getting situated. It's a West Indian party, and everyone is on Caribbean time. Get there at 4:30 am and you'll be fine. That's when things started moving last night.

DO: Start at the Grand Army Plaza side of Flatbush Avenue, at the Brooklyn Public Library. The bands get set up on Flatbush between Eastern Parkway and Empire Boulevard. It then travels down Empire until Nostrand Avenue, where it takes a right and continues on to Linden Boulevard.

DO NOT: Wear nice clothes. You will get dirty. There's baby powder. And sparkles. And lots of paint - most of which doesn't seem to be water soluble. Unless you're quick, you'll get hit with one or more of these objects.

DO: Bring something to drink. There's nothing around on this stretch of Flatbush, and there was only one person selling bottles of water along the route in the wee hours. If you're going to dance, you'll want water. And perhaps something else. Remember, clear "liquids" are for clear bottles only. For beverages of mixed elements, I'd consider a SIGG. I'll let you draw your own conclusions, and of course I would never suggest breaking the law. Even if it is only a $25 fine these days.

DO NOT: Go to this parade if you're not prepared to take part in the celebration. You may find yourself being warned to "Dance or go home" by a very large Haitian woman in a skimpy French maid's outfit. That was the point last night where I decided that I was done taking pictures and should start dancing. Large Haitian/French maids are very persuasive.

DO: Find your favorite band early, and get as close as you can. While El Dorado - City of Gold seemed to be very popular, I was more impressed with a non-descript band of probably 30 or so steel pan players. Take the time before the parade starts moving to see all of the bands strutting their stuff, and stick to the one that seems to suit your taste. And be prepared to like the song that they're currently playing - it's likely that they'll only play that and perhaps one other tune.

DO NOT: Start after Empire Boulevard. It seems that once you get to Bedford Avenue, foot traffic is one-way only - away from the parade. If you leave the cordoned-off area, you won't be able to get back in. Well, at least easily.

DO: Grab some food from the food vendors set up along Empire. I had a fantastic bake and saltfish from a Trinidadian/Guyanese vendor near Rogers Avenue. There's lots of places serving corn soup, and by 6 am there was jerk chicken being thrown on makeshift grills constructed from oil drums. If you're not a fan of street food (even though you should be), Hammond's Bakery and Jerk Center on Nostrand is open all night for all of your jerk needs.

Got any other tips? Please post them in the comments.

Artichoke flowers - the new puppies?

Yesterday morning, while at the Union Square Greenmarket (aka farmer's market) in NYC, I picked up an artichoke flower for my wife. During my walk through the market to the subway entrance, and my subsequent subway ride back to Brooklyn, no fewer than two dozen people stopped me to ask what I was carrying.

By the time I returned home, I became convinced of this fact - an artichoke flower may perhaps be the cheapest and quickest way to meet someone in the city. Men and women of all ages stopped me to inquire about my purchase, which cost all of $5. In NYC, this attention is typically doled out upon only one other object - puppies, the cutest of which can cost upwards of $5,000. So, for 1/10 of 1% of the cost of a canine, I received the same amount of attention as the bearer of a cockapoo or puggle.

So, to all those people looking to meet other people, I suggest skipping the walking, the plastic bags, and the shredded shoes, and just pick up an artichoke flower. Hermits, shut-ins, and other socially-averse types, on the other hand, might want to steer clear.

Yo La La! est très fantastique

I may not be "the music guy" in the dealnews offices, but it's probably safe to say that I have one of the most eclectic collections of the lot. One of the more peculiar styles that I happen to fancy is French hip-hop. I don't know why I like it as much as I do - I do have francophone-leaning tendencies (I support the French national team in international soccer over the US team), and I guess my last name could be construed as French (many people try to French it up as "kahn-TRAY" - it's "hacked" Lithuanian, people!) - but I just really dig it.

Back in the 90s I started listening to MC Solaar, but that was pretty much it until a trip to Montréal back in 2000 introduced me to the poppy, tacky, and wonderful stylings of Yannick. (And apparently it wasn't just me, some productions of Jersey Boys start with an even tackier rendition of Yannick's "C'est Soirées-Là", which samples heavily from The Four Seasons' "Oh, What A Night".) This track was the catalyst that sent me deeper into French hip-hop, where I discovered deepr, more interesting artists like Oxmo Puccino, Kool Shen, and 113.

While it was relatively easy to find new artists by using the French iTunes store's singles chart for rap and R&B, I pretty much knew that I was only getting access to the most popular - and not necessarily the best - artists.

So, while futzing around this weekend, I happened upon an excellent podcast called Yo La La! While the commentary is heavily accented, it's in English and well produced. The host curates each show into different topics (religion in hip hop, women in rap, Swiss artists, etc.) and spins more underground artists - 90% of who I've never even heard of. It's "monthly", but there's only been three editions this year. However, there are 36 podcasts available dating back to 2005, and if you're not familiar with the style, then most of these tracks will be new to you. For a starter, I'd check out podcast #32, which focuses on Franco-American collaborations and features tracks from IAM, Suprême NTM, and Guru. Don't worry if you don't understand French - the beats and the flow are still catchy no matter what language you speak. Profitez-en!

(If you want to subscribe to this podcast, paste this URL into your iTunes account or wherever better podcasts are listened to: http://www.yolala.org/yolala.xml .)

Street meat showdown in midtown Manhattan

Those who know me personally are aware that I'm a huge fan of street meat, both here in my home in New York City and around the world. When done well, it can be an inexpensive, delicious, and filling meal - be it at the taco trucks of Woodside, the Uigher kebab vendors in Flushing, or the Red Hook Ballfields for some ceviche or baleadas.

While Latin American and Asian vendors tend to dominate the outer boroughs, the keystones of the Manhattan street meat scene are the aptly named "lamb over rice" and "chicken over rice". Served up by Indians, Pakastanis, Israelis, Greeks, Trinidadians, and more, this platter generally consists of just a few staples: Grilled chicken or lamb; rice; a small salad; and a choice of several sauces - white, green, red, and hot, to name a few. (As for what each sauce contains, I have no idea - each of their flavor profiles can be summed up by their description - the white sauce tastes like "white", the hot sauce tastes "hot", etc.)

My wife works in midtown, and as such I've had the fortune to sample a few of these vendors. Each of us has our favorites - I tend to go for the more Caribbean spiced version from the Trini Pak Boyz on 44th, where my wife prefers the Kwik Meal cart on 46th and 6th. However, we've sampled little outside of those two carts, and certainly not as scientifically as in Midtown LUNCH's excellent Street-Meat-Palooza: A 13 Cart Chicken/Lamb Over Rice Showdown. A team of 20 street meat fans sampled 13 vendors and rated them on the individual components and overall package.

My favorite cart came in 7th, while my wife's came in 5th. All I know is that next time I'm in midtown for lunch, we'll both be making a trek up to 53rd and 6th.

Street-Meat-Palooza: A 13 Cart Chicken/Lamb Over Rice Showdown (Midtown Lunch via Eater.com)

What would Alanis say?

I've become a big fan of downforeveryoneorjustme.com in the past few weeks. My connection bugs out every once in a while, and I never know if it's just me or not. However, this morning I tried Amazon.com, which was acting wonky for me. What did I get?

Ironic, huh?

With my freeze ray I will stop ...

Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog - Act I is out and it's brilliant. Is there anything NPH can't do?

And in case you're tempted by the iTunes store, which charges $1.99 for this 14 minute clip, it's available for free on Hulu.

Looking forward to Thursday when Act II debuts ...

Beating Microsoft's XP ban

Every where I look, people are having problems with Vista. My parents' computer has had a malfunctioning Internet Explorer for months. (They've been using FireFox, but certain tools they use require IE.) Even my co-workers at dealnews, who are a rather tech savvy lot, are having issues - one just recently lost an afternoon to a bug with Vista, FireFox, and our custom back end. And that's just the tip of the iceberg - the Internet is full of horror stories, gripes, and general disgust with Vista.

With all of these issues, you'd assume that you'd still be able to order a system with a stable, tried-and-true operating system such as Windows XP Home. (While XP definitely has its share of issues, most of them are known and are easily fixable.) However, on June 30, Microsoft essentially killed off XP Home, ending its sale through computer manufacturers such as Dell, HP, and Lenovo. Several loopholes exist, such as the availability of XP Home on UMPCs such as the ASUS Eee PC, and the "downgrade rights" included with the purchase of Vista Business or Ultimate. But for those people who need something more powerful than a subnotebook, or can't bear the thought of spending $150 or more to upgrade from Vista Home Basic to Vista Business or Ultimate, just to downgrade it to XP Professional, there isn't much of an option.

Or so I thought ...

I'm in the market for a beater computer for my Huntsville office and I've had nothing but good luck with Dell so far. While checking out a deal on its site recently, I ended up in the Dell Outlet. There - staring right at me - was an Inspiron system with XP Home pre-installed. Sure, it was a factory-refurb, but it still had a one-year Dell warranty. After a little digging around, I discovered a treasure trove of XP Home and Pro systems, with prices starting at $229. Of course, that miserly sum scored a miserly system, however - Sempron, 512MB RAM - the dregs, essentially. But there were loads of decent systems, too, with prices heading north of the $2k mark. I'll definitely be able to find something at a decent price point and put off the dreaded Vista upgrade for a few years to come.

As of the time of this post, there were 47 Inspiron desktops available with XP Home, as well as 114 Dimension desktops with XP Professional. So, if you're looking to score a new(ish) system with XP, it's worth taking a gander at Dell Outlet.